A Family View


As women we are tasked with an enormous responsibility of setting the tone in our families. This can feel like a privilege on the good days when everyone is getting along and peace is pervasive. It weighs us down on the impossible days when nothing goes right and we are on edge with one another. We feel guilty when we don’t do it “right” and sometimes are too tired to appreciate the fruit of doing it “well”. At times we defiantly refuse to admit that we do indeed sway the mood of the house, after all we reason, we are just one of several.

Ahh, but step back with me a moment. If I journey down my mental categorization of the good and bad moments in our family there is often a clear influencer. Me. That is tough to swallow. I am a flawed being and my family has travelled the road of growth along with me.

It is Me that I can see angrily demanding my children behave. Times I wish I could have had the tools to do better. Frustration in my husband’s eyes when I resolutely dug into the opposite way he desired. But, I know I did the best I knew how that day, that moment. Those marginal times exist in any family.

Better though to remember the sweet eyes of a child looking up to a Mother who comforts, delights, learns, explores with them. My husband’s actions and words reflecting the joy of having me for his wife.That’s Me too.

Do you relate to why it matters so deeply to recognize this influence? There is not a day that goes by that I do not influence this family, and I thank God for every moment that strengthens my resolve to influence well. In love, compassion, encouragement.

Proverbs 12:25 teaches “An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.”  We have the awesome privilege of being that kind word.

I love pictures like this. In our march forward of being the heart of our homes, we sometimes forget to fall to the rear. That can be where the best view lies. Not just in leading, but being the love that brings up the rear & gathers in from the edges.

The fruit of our labor is most clearly visible, by taking time to slow down long enough to see it.


About christasterken

Committed to a life of purpose. Learning to live abundantly. Embracing creativity. Questioning. Delighting in the comforts of home and family. Determining not to settle only for how things are, but how they could be. Writing is part of who I am, so I trust In God who gave the gift to show me how I can serve Him through it. That is my life…one word at a time. Psalm 89:11a“Teach me your way , O Lord, and I will walk in your truth”

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